The thing is ladies and gentlemen I already feel huge. I’m convinced I’m huge. I know I’m huge. Things don’t fit they stick out in odd places, and I waddle when I walk - as a colleague of mine never fails to remind me - I look basically like a watermelon with legs. ( I do hope he meant it somewhat affectionally although I highly doubt it)
But despite being huge I’m and would also be the most stubborn waddling water melon that you will ever have the pleasure to encounter.
There is something about shopping in the maternity section of stores or going in a maternity shop that just makes me a tad - thinking hard for the right word here - a bit erm OLD? erm its not really quite the right word but my brain as you know is not really functioning the way it should these days.
So I walk into the usual places that I shop - and just get tops in very large sizes - which fit me fine and does not make me look like a pregnant schoolgirl. But the stares I get from people who shop in the stores (anorexic teenage girls , giggle gaggle girls, career girls with perfect hair and hydrated cuticles in a french manicure and also ladies of leisure and the lot) and also the salespeople (whom either pretend to ignore me but give me the sideways stare) frankly are annoying, somewhat disturbing and makes me want to dig their eyes out with my fingers.
I wonder if they are SMART enough to know that you can't STARE a bump away!